1 00:00:04,171 --> 00:00:06,287 CUTE BIKER: I like to get my Christmas shopping done early. 2 00:00:06,965 --> 00:00:09,172 Do you have anything that's in the spirit of the season? 3 00:00:09,384 --> 00:00:11,250 Uh... How about these crystals? 4 00:00:11,470 --> 00:00:13,586 (CHUCKLES) That looks like broken glass. 5 00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,004 What are you, a COP? 6 00:00:15,224 --> 00:00:16,714 Oh! What is that new thing? 7 00:00:17,768 --> 00:00:18,633 Grunkle Stan? 8 00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:20,217 Can we go to the diner? 9 00:00:20,437 --> 00:00:22,804 We're hungry! 10 00:00:23,023 --> 00:00:24,605 Hungry! 11 00:00:24,816 --> 00:00:25,726 (BOTH GROANING) 12 00:00:28,695 --> 00:00:31,153 Yeah, sure. Soon as this yahoo makes up his mind. 13 00:00:31,323 --> 00:00:33,360 Do you have this in another animal? 14 00:00:34,159 --> 00:00:35,945 I'm fine locking him inside, if you are. 15 00:00:39,373 --> 00:00:41,364 Puma shirt, panther shirt. 16 00:00:41,583 --> 00:00:43,870 -Puma shirt, panther shirt. -(CAR ENGINE STARTING) 17 00:00:44,044 --> 00:00:45,534 Puma shirt... 18 00:00:47,130 --> 00:00:47,995 Panther shirt! 19 00:00:48,215 --> 00:00:50,172 (THEME MUSIC PLAYING) 20 00:01:33,969 --> 00:01:36,631 Shoo! Git! 21 00:01:36,972 --> 00:01:37,928 (CHATTERING) 22 00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:41,386 Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. 23 00:01:42,144 --> 00:01:44,135 Go! Go! Go! Go! 24 00:01:46,064 --> 00:01:47,850 (CHEERING) 25 00:01:48,942 --> 00:01:50,603 (GLASS SHATTERING) 26 00:01:50,819 --> 00:01:53,436 Lazy Susan, there's my little ray of sunshine. 27 00:01:53,655 --> 00:01:55,145 Where were you yesterday? 28 00:01:55,324 --> 00:01:56,985 I got hit by a bus. 29 00:01:57,159 --> 00:01:58,115 (LAUGHING) 30 00:01:58,327 --> 00:01:59,283 Hilarious! 31 00:01:59,494 --> 00:02:01,781 Thank you! (LAUGHING) 32 00:02:04,166 --> 00:02:05,531 You do split plates, right? 33 00:02:06,001 --> 00:02:09,494 Maybe! Wink! 34 00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:12,338 Great! We'll all split a one-fourth of the Number Seven, 35 00:02:12,549 --> 00:02:15,837 plus a free salad dressing for the lady, and a small plate of ketchup for the boy. 36 00:02:16,053 --> 00:02:18,545 But, Grunkle Stan, I want pancakes! 37 00:02:18,764 --> 00:02:21,051 With the fancy flour they use these days? (SCOFFS) 38 00:02:21,266 --> 00:02:23,598 What am I, made of money? Tap-tap. 39 00:02:23,810 --> 00:02:24,720 Aw... 40 00:02:29,483 --> 00:02:31,724 -(CRACKING KNUCKLES) -Don't worry, guys, pancakes are on me! 41 00:02:32,110 --> 00:02:34,317 I'm gonna win some by beating that manliness tester. 42 00:02:34,821 --> 00:02:35,936 "Manliness tester?" 43 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:37,021 "Beating?" 44 00:02:37,199 --> 00:02:38,906 (BOTH LAUGHING) 45 00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:42,033 He says... He says he's... 46 00:02:42,204 --> 00:02:43,569 (LAUGHING CONTINUES) 47 00:02:43,789 --> 00:02:44,950 What? What's so funny? 48 00:02:45,290 --> 00:02:46,826 Oh, no offense, Dipper, 49 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:51,369 but you're not exactly Manly Mannington. (CHUCKLES) 50 00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:56,173 Hey! I am too Manly Manny... Or whatever it is you said! 51 00:02:56,385 --> 00:02:58,001 Look, face the music, kid. 52 00:02:58,220 --> 00:03:00,587 You got no muscles, you smell like baby wipes. 53 00:03:00,764 --> 00:03:03,847 And let's not forget last Tuesday's incident. 54 00:03:04,101 --> 00:03:07,639 (SINGING) Disco girl, coming through 55 00:03:07,854 --> 00:03:09,891 That girl is you 56 00:03:10,107 --> 00:03:11,723 (SHOUTING) Don't come in, don't come in! 57 00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:15,355 You were listening to girly, Icelandic pop sensation Babba? 58 00:03:15,779 --> 00:03:18,191 No! (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) I wasn't... It's not important! 59 00:03:18,407 --> 00:03:20,865 Look, come on, guys, I'm plenty masculine. 60 00:03:21,076 --> 00:03:22,407 You see this chest hair? 61 00:03:22,619 --> 00:03:25,452 -Put it away! Put it away! -So smooth! My eyes! 62 00:03:25,997 --> 00:03:26,953 Oh, man! 63 00:03:27,165 --> 00:03:29,327 (BOTH LAUGHING) 64 00:03:29,668 --> 00:03:33,662 Fine, family-of-little-faith! Get ready to eat your words! 65 00:03:33,839 --> 00:03:35,921 And a plate of delicious pancakes. 66 00:03:41,930 --> 00:03:45,969 All right, Dipper. Time to manhandle this man-handle. 67 00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:52,267 And a one, and a two... 68 00:03:52,441 --> 00:03:53,727 Quit stalling! 69 00:03:54,401 --> 00:03:55,607 (DIPPER GRUNTING) 70 00:04:00,657 --> 00:04:01,692 (STRAINING) 71 00:04:06,913 --> 00:04:08,278 (BABY GURGLING) 72 00:04:09,124 --> 00:04:10,034 Aw, what? 73 00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:11,740 (SCOFFING) This thing must be broken! 74 00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:14,626 It's totally broken, guys! It's like a million years old. 75 00:04:14,838 --> 00:04:17,500 Probably ran out of steam power, or... 76 00:04:18,341 --> 00:04:19,206 (CRACKING KNUCKLES) 77 00:04:19,426 --> 00:04:21,758 It's rickety, man. You shouldn't even... 78 00:04:25,849 --> 00:04:28,261 Yeah! Pancakes for everyone! 79 00:04:28,477 --> 00:04:30,263 (ALL CHEERING) 80 00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:34,096 (BOTH LAUGHING) 81 00:04:34,775 --> 00:04:36,311 I need to get some chest hair, and fast. 82 00:04:36,902 --> 00:04:37,937 -(CHATTERING) -(GRUNTS) 83 00:04:38,153 --> 00:04:40,895 I'm fine! (LAUGHING NERVOUSLY) Everything's fine. 84 00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:43,860 Yeesh! How am I related to that? 85 00:04:44,075 --> 00:04:48,364 Come on, Grunkle Stan. I'm sure deep down you have a soft side, too. 86 00:04:48,580 --> 00:04:51,914 Ha! Nothing in here but a cold, dark, empty soul. 87 00:04:52,918 --> 00:04:53,828 Food! 88 00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:56,619 Thanks, there, sugar pot. I mean, honey wasp. 89 00:04:56,838 --> 00:04:58,420 Kitten baby. Baby, baby cow... 90 00:04:58,632 --> 00:05:01,465 (LAUGHS) Silly! Silly man. 91 00:05:01,802 --> 00:05:02,758 What was that about? 92 00:05:02,969 --> 00:05:06,382 Nothing. I don't want to talk about it. Talk about what? Why is this table wet? 93 00:05:06,598 --> 00:05:07,804 Wait just a second. 94 00:05:08,183 --> 00:05:11,301 I think I have an idea happening here. You... 95 00:05:11,520 --> 00:05:12,760 -STAN: No! -And her... 96 00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:13,889 -STAN: Stop it! -(SCREAMING) Oh! 97 00:05:14,397 --> 00:05:17,230 -Oh, boy. -You have a thing for Lazy Susan! 98 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:19,141 You do have a soft side! 99 00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:22,857 But... Keep it down, will you? All right, I admit it, okay? 100 00:05:23,073 --> 00:05:24,404 It would be nice if she liked me. 101 00:05:24,616 --> 00:05:26,198 But I've been out of the game for so long, 102 00:05:26,409 --> 00:05:27,524 I wouldn't know where to start! 103 00:05:27,744 --> 00:05:29,826 I mean, look at her! She's so classy. 104 00:05:30,038 --> 00:05:32,530 Spin, you dumb pies, spin! 105 00:05:33,083 --> 00:05:37,418 Grunkle Stan, you are a cranky, gross, weird old man. 106 00:05:37,629 --> 00:05:39,620 But we will get Lazy Susan to like you 107 00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:42,081 because nothing is stronger than the power of... 108 00:05:42,300 --> 00:05:43,790 -Love? -Mabel 109 00:05:44,719 --> 00:05:46,335 To victory! 110 00:05:49,975 --> 00:05:53,593 "Not manly enough." Stupid diner. Stupid lumberjack. 111 00:05:53,812 --> 00:05:55,723 (SPUTTERING) 112 00:05:56,022 --> 00:06:00,061 Another hydrant destroyed! It's a gosh-danged mystery. 113 00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:02,692 Wanna take off our uniforms and run around in circles? 114 00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:04,732 Quit reading my mind. 115 00:06:04,990 --> 00:06:07,402 (BOTH SQUEALING AND GIGGLING) 116 00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:12,153 Oh! I'm sorry, I was looking for the mailman. 117 00:06:12,497 --> 00:06:15,080 Oh! What, are you saying I'm not a "male" man? 118 00:06:15,292 --> 00:06:16,282 Is that what you're trying to say? 119 00:06:16,501 --> 00:06:19,619 I'm not male? I'm... I'm not a man? Is that... Is that what you're getting at? 120 00:06:19,838 --> 00:06:20,794 Are you crying? 121 00:06:20,964 --> 00:06:22,375 (WHIMPERING) 122 00:06:25,594 --> 00:06:27,426 DIPPER: TWO, 123 00:06:27,637 --> 00:06:29,002 (STRAINING) three, 124 00:06:30,599 --> 00:06:32,340 (STRAINING) four... 125 00:06:32,559 --> 00:06:33,720 (PANTING) 126 00:06:35,353 --> 00:06:36,935 No chest hair yet. 127 00:06:37,147 --> 00:06:40,060 Is it physical? Is it mental? What's the secret? 128 00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:45,436 You said it, brother! I need help. 129 00:06:45,655 --> 00:06:46,816 (RUMBLING) 130 00:06:47,782 --> 00:06:49,193 (ROARING) 131 00:06:49,784 --> 00:06:51,149 (ANIMALS CHITTERING) 132 00:06:51,995 --> 00:06:54,987 For the love of all that's holy, run! 133 00:06:59,586 --> 00:07:00,747 (ROARING) 134 00:07:02,130 --> 00:07:04,337 (THUNDERING FOOTSTEPS) 135 00:07:05,592 --> 00:07:06,548 (SHRIEKING) 136 00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:07,962 Wait, sorry. 137 00:07:08,178 --> 00:07:10,135 Aah! (COUGHING) 138 00:07:12,390 --> 00:07:13,346 (DIPPER GASPING) 139 00:07:19,564 --> 00:07:20,895 (GROWLING) 140 00:07:21,191 --> 00:07:22,522 (YAWNS) 141 00:07:31,201 --> 00:07:34,114 Please don't eat me! I haven't showered in, like, a week. 142 00:07:34,329 --> 00:07:37,162 And I'm... I'm, like, all elbows! Elbows and gristle! 143 00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:39,748 -You -(SHRIEKS) 144 00:07:39,960 --> 00:07:40,995 Gonna finish that? 145 00:07:41,586 --> 00:07:42,542 No. 146 00:07:42,879 --> 00:07:43,789 (MUNCHING) 147 00:07:44,172 --> 00:07:46,504 Can't believe it. Part animal, part human. 148 00:07:46,716 --> 00:07:48,002 Are you some kind of minotaur? 149 00:07:48,218 --> 00:07:51,961 I'm a manotaur! Half man, half, uh... 150 00:07:52,180 --> 00:07:53,386 Ha“ taut! 151 00:07:53,598 --> 00:07:55,589 So did I, like, summon you or... 152 00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:58,972 The smell of jerky summoned me! Jerky! 153 00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:00,097 (GRUNTS) 154 00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:03,513 (ROARS) 155 00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:05,103 (LAUGHS) 156 00:08:05,568 --> 00:08:06,524 (SNIFFING) 157 00:08:10,156 --> 00:08:11,863 1 smell (SNIFFING) 158 00:08:12,909 --> 00:08:15,196 Emotional issues. 159 00:08:15,578 --> 00:08:18,741 I got problems, manotaur. Man-related problems. 160 00:08:21,167 --> 00:08:24,159 -Well, my own uncle called me a wimp. -(GRUNTING) Uh-huh. Uh-huh. 161 00:08:24,379 --> 00:08:26,711 And I kind of flunked this manliness video game thing. 162 00:08:26,881 --> 00:08:27,916 Mmm... 163 00:08:28,174 --> 00:08:30,211 Hey! You know, you seem pretty manly. 164 00:08:30,427 --> 00:08:32,168 Maybe you could give me some pointers? 165 00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:36,468 Hmm. Very well! Climb atop my back hair, child! 166 00:08:36,641 --> 00:08:38,803 -(FLIES BUZZING) -Uh... Okay. 167 00:08:39,019 --> 00:08:41,010 MANOTAU R: Yes! Yes! 168 00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:44,221 -(DIPPER GASPING) -(MANOTAUR LAUGHING) 169 00:08:44,399 --> 00:08:45,685 (GRUNTING) 170 00:08:46,693 --> 00:08:47,899 Dude, watch out! 171 00:08:48,903 --> 00:08:50,143 (MANOTAUR GRUNTING) 172 00:08:50,572 --> 00:08:51,528 (SCREAMING) 173 00:08:54,034 --> 00:08:54,990 Whoa! 174 00:08:55,952 --> 00:08:57,738 (ALL GRUNTING) 175 00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:01,155 This place is amazing! 176 00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:03,456 The gnomes live in the trees, 177 00:09:03,668 --> 00:09:06,410 the mer-people live in the water, 'cause they're losers! 178 00:09:06,629 --> 00:09:10,418 But we manotaurs crash in the man cave! 179 00:09:10,633 --> 00:09:11,794 (some RINGING) 180 00:09:12,010 --> 00:09:16,720 Beasts! I have brought you a hairless child! 181 00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:18,763 -'Sup. -MANOTAURS: Huh? 182 00:09:18,975 --> 00:09:23,014 This is Pubertor, Testosteraur, Pituitor. 183 00:09:23,229 --> 00:09:25,641 And I'm Chutzpar. And you are? 184 00:09:25,940 --> 00:09:27,226 My name's Dipper. 185 00:09:27,442 --> 00:09:29,604 -(ALL JEERING) -Weak! 186 00:09:29,819 --> 00:09:32,026 The, uh, Destructor? 187 00:09:32,655 --> 00:09:34,521 -Yeah, that's better. -Yeah. 188 00:09:34,949 --> 00:09:36,280 (some RINGING) 189 00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:40,828 Dipper the Destructor wants us to teach him the secrets to our manliness! 190 00:09:41,081 --> 00:09:44,073 I need your help. Look at this, guys. Look at this! 191 00:09:44,793 --> 00:09:47,205 I must confer with the high council. 192 00:09:47,462 --> 00:09:49,373 So, teach him our man secrets or what? 193 00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:51,500 He's a human! I don't like him. 194 00:09:51,716 --> 00:09:53,252 I don't like your face! 195 00:09:53,593 --> 00:09:54,503 (BOTH GRUNTING) 196 00:09:54,719 --> 00:09:56,130 (ALL GRUNTING) 197 00:09:57,889 --> 00:09:59,721 -I like these guys. -(MANOTAUR SCREAMS) 198 00:10:03,728 --> 00:10:08,268 Okay, Grunkle Stan! Welcome to the first clay of whatever is left of your life! 199 00:10:08,483 --> 00:10:10,645 -First, a "before" picture. -(SHRIEKING) 200 00:10:13,071 --> 00:10:15,187 I never miss a scrap-book-or-tunity! 201 00:10:15,406 --> 00:10:17,397 Diddlydum... Memories 202 00:10:18,076 --> 00:10:20,033 Bleep. Let's start out with some role-playing. 203 00:10:20,286 --> 00:10:21,742 Soos will play Lazy Susan. 204 00:10:22,288 --> 00:10:23,574 I'm soft, like a woman. 205 00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:26,365 Grunkle Stan, show me how you approach a woman. 206 00:10:26,876 --> 00:10:30,039 Remember, this is a safe, non-judgmental environment. 207 00:10:30,255 --> 00:10:33,293 I'll just be right off to the side, judging you on a scale from one to ten. 208 00:10:37,345 --> 00:10:38,255 (SPITTING) 209 00:10:38,471 --> 00:10:39,461 Can I borrow some money? 210 00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:40,595 (MABEL BLOWING WHISTLE) 211 00:10:41,391 --> 00:10:43,007 This is going to be harder than I thought. 212 00:10:43,268 --> 00:10:45,600 After a lot of punching, we have decided 213 00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:48,520 to deny your request to learn our manly secrets. 214 00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:50,143 Denied! (GRUNTS) 215 00:10:50,608 --> 00:10:51,723 Denied? 216 00:10:53,069 --> 00:10:55,231 Okay. Fine. That's okay with me. 217 00:10:55,446 --> 00:10:57,858 Obviously you guys think it would be too hard to train me! 218 00:10:58,074 --> 00:11:00,691 Maybe you're not man enough to try! 219 00:11:00,994 --> 00:11:02,075 ALL: Huh? 220 00:11:02,287 --> 00:11:03,777 Not man enough? 221 00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:05,203 Destructor... 222 00:11:05,415 --> 00:11:06,951 Not man enough? 223 00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:08,248 He didn't mean it. 224 00:11:08,459 --> 00:11:12,043 I have three Y chromosomes, six Adam's apples, 225 00:11:12,255 --> 00:11:15,338 pecs on my abs and fists for nipples! 226 00:11:15,925 --> 00:11:18,883 Seems to me you're scared to teach me how to be a man. 227 00:11:19,220 --> 00:11:21,211 Hey, do you guys hear that? It sounds like... 228 00:11:21,431 --> 00:11:22,341 (MIMICKING CHICKEN) 229 00:11:22,557 --> 00:11:24,548 Oh, that's weird... (CLUCKING) 230 00:11:24,767 --> 00:11:26,178 Is that... (CLUCKING) 231 00:11:26,394 --> 00:11:28,431 That sounds like... (CLUCKING) Yeah, a bunch of chickens. 232 00:11:28,605 --> 00:11:30,471 -(ALL GASP) -(ALL WHISPERING) 233 00:11:30,857 --> 00:11:32,018 I feel all weird. 234 00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:34,975 He's using some sort of brain magic. 235 00:11:35,570 --> 00:11:37,686 After a second round of deliberation, 236 00:11:37,947 --> 00:11:40,405 we have decided to help you become a man! 237 00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,907 ALL: (CHANTING) Man! Man! Man! Man! Man! 238 00:11:43,119 --> 00:11:46,237 Great! Thanks, guys. Whatever it is, I will not let you down. 239 00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:48,780 (EAGLE SCREECH ES) 240 00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:51,500 Being a man is about conquering your fears! 241 00:11:51,961 --> 00:11:57,673 For your first man-task, you must plunge your fist into the pain hole! 242 00:11:58,468 --> 00:11:59,924 -(ALL GASPING) -The what? 243 00:12:01,763 --> 00:12:03,345 Pain hole, shmain hole... 244 00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:04,967 (SCREAMING IN PAIN) 245 00:12:10,772 --> 00:12:12,308 Are you sure this is really necessary? 246 00:12:12,482 --> 00:12:14,143 You want to be a man, don't you? 247 00:12:14,359 --> 00:12:16,942 ALL: (CHANTING) Man! Man! Man! Man! Man! Man! 248 00:12:19,822 --> 00:12:21,404 (DIPPER SCREAMING) 249 00:12:23,159 --> 00:12:26,993 All right, let's try to get that inner beauty on the outside! 250 00:12:27,538 --> 00:12:28,573 Smile harder. 251 00:12:28,790 --> 00:12:29,700 (STRAINING) 252 00:12:30,041 --> 00:12:31,873 -Harder. -(STRAINING) 253 00:12:32,085 --> 00:12:33,667 Perfect. Soos! 254 00:12:34,170 --> 00:12:35,831 -'Sup, hambone? -What do you think? 255 00:12:37,590 --> 00:12:39,501 (SCREAMING) 256 00:12:40,551 --> 00:12:43,919 (SIGHS) This is going to take some really great training music. 257 00:12:46,724 --> 00:12:48,590 ('80s SYNTH MUSIC PLAYING) 258 00:12:48,810 --> 00:12:50,471 When a tiger roars 259 00:12:50,645 --> 00:12:53,137 And the mountain cries 260 00:12:54,232 --> 00:12:58,647 You gotta dream the dream You gotta win the prize 261 00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:03,443 You're gonna go the miles You're gonna face the trials 262 00:13:04,158 --> 00:13:08,117 Never miss out on the sights to see You gotta believe your beliefs are real 263 00:13:08,538 --> 00:13:10,495 Now you're drinking from a fire hydrant 264 00:13:10,707 --> 00:13:12,698 Teach your uncle how to wear a cummerbund 265 00:13:12,917 --> 00:13:15,033 Now you're gonna jump a crazy gorge 266 00:13:15,253 --> 00:13:17,540 Keep on shaving that hairy uncle 267 00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:19,041 Uh... 268 00:13:19,257 --> 00:13:21,373 I don't really know what's happening in this part 269 00:13:22,343 --> 00:13:23,253 Yeow! 270 00:13:23,469 --> 00:13:27,929 Your heart's on fire and the fire is in your heart 271 00:13:28,725 --> 00:13:29,965 (YELPS) 272 00:13:30,393 --> 00:13:32,304 Who wants to rub this on my back? 273 00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:35,558 Guys, I just wanna say that these last few hours have been... 274 00:13:35,773 --> 00:13:38,105 I feel like there's really been some growth. 275 00:13:38,401 --> 00:13:39,812 I have a growth! 276 00:13:40,445 --> 00:13:43,403 Glurk, you are hilarious today! 277 00:13:44,282 --> 00:13:46,569 (SIGHING) It's just, you guys took me under your wing 278 00:13:46,784 --> 00:13:48,195 and have just been so supportive. 279 00:13:48,411 --> 00:13:49,401 Oh, stOP- 280 00:13:49,620 --> 00:13:50,826 No, you know what? You really have been. 281 00:13:51,039 --> 00:13:52,950 I feel like I'm finally becoming a man here. 282 00:13:53,124 --> 00:13:56,333 Not yet, Destructor! One final task remains... 283 00:13:56,919 --> 00:13:58,830 -Hey, quit it! -You quit it! 284 00:13:59,005 --> 00:14:00,837 The deadliest trial of all! 285 00:14:01,049 --> 00:14:04,667 I've survived 49 other trials. Whatever it is, bring it on! 286 00:14:04,886 --> 00:14:05,967 ALL: Yeah! 287 00:14:16,397 --> 00:14:18,934 Behold our leader, Leaderar! 288 00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:21,274 (HUMMING WISTFULLY) 289 00:14:21,486 --> 00:14:23,648 Is he, like, the oldest or wisest or... 290 00:14:23,988 --> 00:14:25,274 Greetings, young... 291 00:14:25,490 --> 00:14:27,106 (SCREAMING) 292 00:14:27,283 --> 00:14:30,196 Nah, he's just the offering. That is Leaderar! 293 00:14:31,913 --> 00:14:33,529 -(OLD MANOTAUR SCREAMING) -(GULPING) 294 00:14:36,167 --> 00:14:39,000 You! You wish to be man? 295 00:14:39,212 --> 00:14:40,168 (GRUNTING) 296 00:14:41,798 --> 00:14:42,754 ALL: Yeah! 297 00:14:42,924 --> 00:14:46,918 Then you must do heroic act. Go to highest mountain. 298 00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:49,302 (SCREAMING IN PAIN) 299 00:14:49,514 --> 00:14:50,424 (GASPING) 300 00:14:52,392 --> 00:14:56,431 And bring back head of the Mum-Bear! 301 00:14:56,979 --> 00:14:58,720 (ALL EXCLAIMING) 302 00:14:58,940 --> 00:15:01,477 The "Multi-Bear"? Is that some sort of bear? 303 00:15:01,818 --> 00:15:03,274 He's our sworn enemy! 304 00:15:03,528 --> 00:15:07,647 Conquer him, and your mansformation will be complete. 305 00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:10,274 Conquer? I don't know, man. 306 00:15:10,618 --> 00:15:12,825 Destructor, is this yours? 307 00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:15,366 Uh, no! I don't know whose that is. 308 00:15:15,623 --> 00:15:17,910 I was just borrowing it. It's friend's, not mine. 309 00:15:18,126 --> 00:15:19,366 (ALL GRUMBLING) 310 00:15:19,585 --> 00:15:20,620 I don't know about this. 311 00:15:20,837 --> 00:15:21,747 Uh... 312 00:15:24,799 --> 00:15:25,914 Hmm. 313 00:15:26,175 --> 00:15:28,633 I shall conquer the Multi-Bear! 314 00:15:29,178 --> 00:15:30,885 (ALL CHEERING) 315 00:15:31,848 --> 00:15:33,680 (YELPING) I'm okay. 316 00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,927 I'm coming for you, Mum-Bear. 317 00:16:14,182 --> 00:16:19,393 Okay, Grunkle Stan. You started like this, but you became... 318 00:16:20,605 --> 00:16:22,095 Can I scratch myself now? 319 00:16:22,315 --> 00:16:26,479 No! No, no, no! Is that throw-up on your shirt? 320 00:16:27,028 --> 00:16:28,234 I don't know how to answer that. 321 00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:29,444 (SIGHS) 322 00:16:29,697 --> 00:16:31,734 Face it, Mabel, your uncle's unfixable. 323 00:16:32,033 --> 00:16:34,115 Like that spinning pie trolley-thing in the diner. 324 00:16:36,037 --> 00:16:37,778 Grunkle Stan, come with me. 325 00:16:38,247 --> 00:16:39,863 And leave your pants at home! 326 00:16:40,082 --> 00:16:41,117 With pleasure! 327 00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:44,200 (BONES CRUNCHING) 328 00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:47,874 What is a Multi-Bear? 329 00:16:48,090 --> 00:16:49,956 (GROWLING) 330 00:16:52,178 --> 00:16:53,634 (GROWLING) 331 00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:55,336 Oh, that's a Mum-Bear. 332 00:16:56,390 --> 00:16:57,425 (ROARING) 333 00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:59,887 Bear heads. Silence! 334 00:17:00,102 --> 00:17:01,718 (WHIMPERING) 335 00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:04,475 Child, why have you come here? 336 00:17:04,815 --> 00:17:08,524 Mum-Bear, 1 seek your head! Or one of them, anyway. 337 00:17:08,736 --> 00:17:10,022 There's like, what, six? Six heads? 338 00:17:10,238 --> 00:17:13,526 This is foolish! Leave now or die! 339 00:17:15,159 --> 00:17:16,240 So be it! 340 00:17:16,452 --> 00:17:18,739 (ALL ROARING) 341 00:17:24,919 --> 00:17:25,875 (SNARLING) 342 00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:34,425 -Ha! -(ROARING) 343 00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:37,086 -(DIPPER PANTING) -(GROWLING) 344 00:17:37,306 --> 00:17:38,671 (DIPPER GRUNTING) 345 00:17:38,891 --> 00:17:40,973 (ROARING) 346 00:17:46,857 --> 00:17:49,019 A real man shows no mercy! 347 00:17:49,360 --> 00:17:50,316 (SIGHING) 348 00:17:50,736 --> 00:17:52,192 Very well, warrior. 349 00:17:52,572 --> 00:17:55,735 But will you grant a magical beast one last request? 350 00:17:56,284 --> 00:17:57,399 Uh... Okay. 351 00:17:57,785 --> 00:18:01,119 I wish to die listening to my favorite song. 352 00:18:03,165 --> 00:18:05,327 Tape is already in there. You could just hit any... 353 00:18:05,585 --> 00:18:06,871 Yeah, yeah, that's it. Press and hold. 354 00:18:07,044 --> 00:18:11,129 Disco girl coming through That girl is you... 355 00:18:11,507 --> 00:18:15,296 You listen to Icelandic pop group Babba? I love Babba. 356 00:18:15,511 --> 00:18:17,548 I thought I was the only one. 357 00:18:17,763 --> 00:18:19,219 All the manotaurs make fun of me 358 00:18:19,432 --> 00:18:22,424 because I know all the words to the song Disco Girl. 359 00:18:22,602 --> 00:18:23,467 Oh, you mean... 360 00:18:23,686 --> 00:18:25,268 (SINGING) Disco girl 361 00:18:25,563 --> 00:18:27,349 (SINGING) Coming through 362 00:18:27,523 --> 00:18:29,764 BOTH: That girl is you 363 00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:32,438 Ooh ooh 364 00:18:32,737 --> 00:18:33,602 (LAUGHING) 365 00:18:33,821 --> 00:18:37,155 Oh! This is crazy. Finally, someone who understands... 366 00:18:37,575 --> 00:18:38,610 Oh, yeah. 367 00:18:38,826 --> 00:18:41,989 I guess I'm supposed to kill you? Or I'll never be a man? 368 00:18:42,163 --> 00:18:43,619 I accept my fate. 369 00:18:43,914 --> 00:18:45,530 No. Really? 370 00:18:45,750 --> 00:18:46,911 It's for the best. 371 00:18:48,377 --> 00:18:49,663 (GRUNTS) 372 00:18:51,589 --> 00:18:52,454 (ALL GASPING) 373 00:18:52,673 --> 00:18:53,629 I'm not gonna do it! 374 00:18:53,799 --> 00:18:57,337 You were told the price of manhood is the Multi-Bear's head! 375 00:18:57,803 --> 00:19:01,546 Listen, Leaderar, all right? You, too, Testosteraur, Pituitor, and... 376 00:19:01,766 --> 00:19:03,803 I don't know, whatever your name is, Beard y. 377 00:19:04,018 --> 00:19:04,849 It's Beard y. 378 00:19:05,061 --> 00:19:07,928 You keep telling me that being a man means doing all these tasks, 379 00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:09,854 and being aggro all the time. 380 00:19:10,358 --> 00:19:12,474 But I'm starting to think that stuff's malarkey! 381 00:19:12,693 --> 00:19:14,149 (ALL EXCLAIMING) 382 00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:15,856 You heard me! Malarkey! 383 00:19:16,072 --> 00:19:18,734 So maybe I don't have muscles, or hair in certain places. 384 00:19:18,949 --> 00:19:22,442 And sure, when a girly pop song comes on the radio sometimes I leave it on. 385 00:19:22,662 --> 00:19:24,448 'Cause dang it, Top 40 hits 386 00:19:24,664 --> 00:19:27,326 are in the Top 40 for a reason! They're catchy! 387 00:19:27,541 --> 00:19:29,532 Destructor! What are you saying? 388 00:19:29,752 --> 00:19:32,039 I'm saying the Multi-Bear is a really nice guy. 389 00:19:32,254 --> 00:19:34,370 And you're a bunch of jerks if you want me to cut off his head! 390 00:19:35,091 --> 00:19:36,673 (GROWLING) 391 00:19:36,842 --> 00:19:37,752 (ALL EXCLAIMING) 392 00:19:37,968 --> 00:19:41,506 Kill the Multi-Bear or never be a man! 393 00:19:42,473 --> 00:19:43,929 Then I guess I will never be a man. 394 00:19:44,475 --> 00:19:45,385 (ALL BOOING) 395 00:19:45,559 --> 00:19:46,549 Weak! 396 00:19:46,936 --> 00:19:48,722 (ALL JEERING) 397 00:19:49,188 --> 00:19:50,428 Lame! 398 00:19:50,940 --> 00:19:53,932 Hey, guys. Who wants to go build something and knock it down? 399 00:19:55,194 --> 00:19:59,779 ALL: Man! Man! Man! Man! Man! Man! Man! Man! 400 00:20:02,660 --> 00:20:04,446 Spin. spin. 401 00:20:04,662 --> 00:20:05,777 (BELL TINKLING) 402 00:20:06,831 --> 00:20:09,789 Lazy Susan. Listen, I know he's not much to look at, 403 00:20:09,959 --> 00:20:11,700 but you're always fixing stuff in the diner. 404 00:20:12,002 --> 00:20:13,242 And if you like fixing stuff, 405 00:20:13,462 --> 00:20:16,079 nothing could use more fixing than my Grunkle Stan. 406 00:20:16,298 --> 00:20:18,460 Also, women live longer than men, so your dating pool is smaller, 407 00:20:18,676 --> 00:20:20,132 and you should really lower your standards. 408 00:20:20,428 --> 00:20:23,136 So, Lazy Susan. (CHUCKLES) What do you say? 409 00:20:27,101 --> 00:20:28,057 (SIGHING) 410 00:20:28,936 --> 00:20:31,519 Hey. Here's my number. 411 00:20:31,939 --> 00:20:33,976 Why don't you give me a call sometime? 412 00:20:34,567 --> 00:20:37,059 -Really? -Really! (LAUGHING) 413 00:20:37,528 --> 00:20:42,318 Also, here's some pie. On the house. For you. 414 00:20:43,117 --> 00:20:44,323 (SQUEALING) 415 00:20:44,535 --> 00:20:47,653 We did it! When are you going to call? You want to call now? 416 00:20:47,872 --> 00:20:49,658 I don't have a phone. Let's buy a phone. 417 00:20:49,874 --> 00:20:51,911 We can put it on a credit card. Let's get a credit card. 418 00:20:52,126 --> 00:20:54,117 Mabel! Let a man enjoy his pie, huh? 419 00:20:57,006 --> 00:21:00,840 Dipper! It's me, Mabel! I'm looking at you through the glass! 420 00:21:01,051 --> 00:21:04,965 Right here. This is my voice! I'm talking to you from inside! 421 00:21:06,724 --> 00:21:08,214 -Did you see me through the... -Yes. 422 00:21:08,434 --> 00:21:09,390 What's wrong? 423 00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:11,176 -I don't want to talk about it. -Good. 424 00:21:11,395 --> 00:21:13,477 It's just these half-man, half-bull humanoids 425 00:21:13,689 --> 00:21:15,350 -were hanging out with me... -Here we go. 426 00:21:15,524 --> 00:21:18,482 But then they wanted me to do this really tough, horrible thing, 427 00:21:18,694 --> 00:21:20,935 but it just wasn't right. So I said no. 428 00:21:21,197 --> 00:21:23,313 You were your own man and you stood up for yourself. 429 00:21:23,908 --> 00:21:25,524 -Huh? -You did what was right, 430 00:21:25,743 --> 00:21:26,949 even though no one agreed with you. 431 00:21:27,161 --> 00:21:29,528 Sounds pretty manly to me. But what do I know? 432 00:21:30,706 --> 00:21:33,744 Wait a minute. Do my eyes deceive me? 433 00:21:34,084 --> 00:21:35,540 You have a chest hair! 434 00:21:35,961 --> 00:21:36,871 (GASPING) 435 00:21:37,087 --> 00:21:38,168 You're right! I do! 436 00:21:38,380 --> 00:21:41,293 (LAUGHING) This is amazing! I really do! 437 00:21:41,509 --> 00:21:44,092 Take that, man tester! Take that, Pituitor! 438 00:21:44,303 --> 00:21:47,216 -Pituitor? -This guy has chest hair! 439 00:21:48,808 --> 00:21:50,549 Scrap-book-or-tunity! 440 00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:54,352 Don't worry, kid. If you're anything like me, 441 00:21:54,522 --> 00:21:55,808 there's more where that came from. 442 00:21:56,690 --> 00:21:58,306 (CHUCKLING) Oh, gross! 443 00:21:58,484 --> 00:21:59,940 (ALL LAUGHING) 444 00:22:02,112 --> 00:22:03,443 Seriously, that's disgusting. 445 00:22:03,656 --> 00:22:04,896 (PHONE RINGING) 446 00:22:05,115 --> 00:22:06,230 Oh, not again! 447 00:22:07,827 --> 00:22:09,738 (WOMAN ON ANSWERING MACHINE) Message number 36. 448 00:22:10,079 --> 00:22:13,993 SUSAN: Hey, handsome. It's me Lazy Susan, calling to say hi. 449 00:22:14,208 --> 00:22:18,418 Hi! My cats also wanted to say hi. 450 00:22:18,629 --> 00:22:20,461 -Say hi, Donald. -(CAT MEWLING) 451 00:22:20,673 --> 00:22:23,005 -Good. Sandy, you say hi. -(CAT MEWLING) 452 00:22:23,217 --> 00:22:25,709 -Mr. Catface, now it's your turn to say... -(CAT YOWLING) 453 00:22:25,928 --> 00:22:27,589 -Mr. Catface! -(CAT YOWLING) 454 00:22:27,763 --> 00:22:30,346 -Anyway, call me! Call me back! -(MACHINE BEEPS) 455 00:22:30,558 --> 00:22:31,889 How do I get out of this?